One of my passions is home theater. I love DVDs, large televisions, and surround sound. One of my lifelong dreams is to put together a kick ass system that gives me massive head trauma and blows up my house. I can’t say I’m an expert home theater tech, but I know more than the rest of these noobs on Sector 930.
The Room
Since we’re all nerds here, I won’t bother with aesthetics. Although an authentic theater look would be cool, it’s not a priority. The main thing here is make the room dark. Ideally, the room doesn’t have windows. If it does, get a thick black curtain and nail that bastard to the wall. All this darkness shouldn’t be much of a problem for most nerds, as it is their natural habitat.
Display
The only real way to watch movies is on a giant ass screen. None of this direct view technology crap. Get yourself a nice, expensive 1080p projector and a 100 foot screen. Just don’t make it a Sony. Something like this ought to do.
The key features are the 1080p resolution, at least one HDMI input, and a DVI input (what nerd doesn’t want to hook his computer up to something like this?).
Sources
What good is a projector if you don’t have anything to play on it? The first component a lot of people have is a cable set top box. If it’s an HD cable box, you should hook it up via the HDMI port. The beautiful thing about HDMI is that it is pure digital, and it carries both video and audio signals. That means one cable for every device. Unfortunately, it also means greater copy protection. But that’s what Google is for.
A word on cables: DO NOT BUY THE PREMIUM CABLES. THEY ARE FOR SUCKERS. Especially for digital protocols, a cable is a cable. They are all the same. Do not spend more than $10 on an HDMI cable. If a salesman tries to tell you that a Monster cable will give you better picture quality, punch him in the face and give him a Texas Titty Twister.
A DVD player is a must-have device, although now you can opt for a Blu-Ray player. If you decide to go old fashioned, make sure it is upconverting and has an HDMI output. Otherwise, a 480p DVD will be a little funky on a 1080p display.
A nerd might also go for an XBox 360 or a Playstation 3. Again, make sure to hook it up via HDMI. Ater that, you can include whatever other devices you want. Camcorders, PCs, DVRs, and even legacy VCRs can be integrated into a nerd screening room. Ideally, the components have HDMI outputs. If not, the proper order of connections, from best to worst, is:
- DVI
- RGB
- component
- S-video
- composite
- RF
What if your display only has one input? How are you going to hook up all these devices? That’s where the A/V receiver comes in.
A/V Receiver
The A/V Receiver is like the router or the switch of the screening room. It takes in inputs from sources, then shoots the video signals to the display and the audio signals to speakers. Behold!
THX Certified, 7.1 audo, 4 assignable HDMI inputs, 1080p upscaling, all with a backlit remote. Decodes Dolby Digital Plus, Dolby TrueHD, DTS-HD Master, and DTS-HD High Resolution. You simply hook all your sources up to this baby, then hook it to your display. Then you can switch to the different sources.
As beautiful as the above image is, the next one is even better.
Mmmmm…. inputs.
A/V Receivers aren’t just for video sources. You can hook up all kinds of audio sources, via coaxial RCA, optical, or the plain ol’ RCA connections. How are you going to hear all that music or thumping action movie? Speakers!
Speakers
Everybody worries about video quality, but trust me, the real difference is sound. Movies and music are totally different when heard on a top-notch system. This is also the hardest area to shop for, and it’s where my expertise is most lacking. You can either find a complete system that matches the capability of your receiver, or you can piece it together. Don’t piss away money, but don’t skimp either.
Calibration
Even when you have all this stuff hooked up, you’re not done yet. Unless your display and speakers are properly calibrated, you will miss out on a lot of quality. Pick up a copy of Digital Video Essentials. Otherwise, the audio and video might be out of sync, or the image might not have the proper color tones or contrast. If you don’t calibrate the system properly before you show it off, you’ll look like a total jackass.
Media server
Here’s where a true nerd should shine. There are many options here. You can be a noob and go with a Windows Media Center PC, or you can put something together and try MythTV. Rip all your DVDs onto the harddrive and chuck them into the closet. I also like to go with a MusicPD server. I can get on my computer, fire up an MPD client, and start playing tunes on my system.
Components and Cabinet
A problem with all these electronic components is that they can get disorganized in a hurry. Cables will start getting tangled up, and you won’t be able to easily replace or add components. The best solution I have seen yet is something like this.
Like the idea of having a server rack? Well now you can have a home theater rack!
Power protection
All these expensive components can be rendered useless with a sudden lightning strike. That’s why you need power protection. Of course, you want one that looks good on the rack!
Remote control
You’ve got all the components, but each one has its own remote. What are you supposed to do with 7 remotes? Get yourself a universal remote. Not one of those cheap things from Wal-Mart that have 10 buttons. Get yourself a real nerd’s remote.
There you have it folks. The nerd screening room. Where all the media in a nerd’s life converges into an orgy of epileptic inducing beauty. Enjoy!
I laughed at the image of you giving a Best Buy salesmen a Texas Titty Twister.
I enjoyed this post.